TT: Things I Imagine Santa Might Say

So Santa is making his rounds. You know he’s gotta have it tough on Christmas Eve. If we were reindeer, you think we might overhear this?

1. Honest, lady. I’m leaving the gifts, not taking them.

2. Do they really expect me to use a painted-on chimney? To heck with it, I’m using the front door.

3. Yum, rum balls.

4. I have got to loose weight!

5. Tsk, tsk, tsk, naughty, naughty.

6. Yum, fruitcake.

7. Nobody believes in me anymore, grumble, grumble.

8. Yum, eggnog. With extra nog!

9. Peeuuu! Dasher! What have you been eating?

10. American Idol for PS3- check, digital picture frame – check, memory sticks – check, whatever happened to toy trains?

11. *Hickup* More run balls and spiked fruitcake. Why, yes, don’t mind if I do.

12. What do you mean I gave you a doll and your sister a race car? Isn’t that what you wanted? Go back to bed!

13. That’s it! Time to go home. I sure am glad I only have to do this once a year.

Alice Audrey