Suzie’s House 364 : Keeping His Thoughts to Himself

Gene focused on his fingering, but his heart wasn’t in the practice session.

“…and I’ll divulge my godless dreams,” Emma sang. “My insignificant, paladin dreams.” She stopped singing and lifted the bottom of her paper bag to look at them from its dark recesses. “Wait. Shouldn’t that be paltry?”

“Just go with it,” Kate kept drumming.

“Yeah, I kind of like ‘paladin’,” Justin grinned around the array of hanging glass bottles he’d been experimenting with. “We should make it a trade mark to have something like that in every song.”

“Wait. ‘Paladin’ is wrong?” Tracy stopped strumming.

Just like he expected, an argument broke out between Tracy and everyone else about the words to the song. Keeping his thoughts to himself, Gene put away his guitar.

“Hey, hey, hey. Where you going?” Bruce came over to him. “We’ve got a gig tomorrow.”

“Yeah. I know.” Gene didn’t bother to explain, but when he gave Bruce a look, the guy backed off.

“Yeah. I guess you’re right. We aren’t going to get anywhere today.” He looked around the practice room with scrunch marks between his eyebrows and a snarly kind of frown. “Right. I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

Bruce was out the door before anyone else noticed. Except maybe Emma. She might have started the argument, but from the way she slinked out the door she had no intention of finishing it.

“Hey! Where’d Emma go? And Bruce?” Kate dropped her drum sticks. She dug out her cell phone and looked at the time. “Crap, I’m late. Justin, are you coming?”

“To supper? Yeah. I said I would, didn’t I?”

The two of them didn’t bother to put anything away. They walked out while Tracy followed, talking at their backs.

“Hey, wait! What do you mean by ‘a paladin is a soldier’? That can’t be right. Wait! I…” She yanked the guitar strap over her head, but the others were already gone.

Which left Gene alone with Tracy. Again.

You’d think he’d get used to it by now; but every time it happened his feelings got worse. Tracy was supposed to be his girlfriend. Right? But all she wanted to do was kiss. That hadn’t been enough for him in a long time. The way she made him feel scared him.

“Can you believe them? It’s like they don’t want to practice at all. I’m so nervous about tomorrow I can hardly stand it.” She bent over to put her bass in it’s case.

Gene’s eyes went right to her butt. He made himself look away before she noticed.

“Oh well. That gives us more time for just the two of us.”

Gene’s gut tightened. A part of him wanted that in the worst way. The rest couldn’t help but think it was pure torture.

“I’ve got something to do,” he muttered. It was pure cowardice. He was afraid to let her touch him again.

“What? Again?”

He tried to slip out the door, but she got in his way.

“That’s it. I’ve had enough. Either you talk to me right now or we’re through.” She put her hands on him. She looked so hot when her eyes flashed like that.

Gene drew in a long, ragged breath. He was already reacting. “Don’t do that.” He plucked her hands off his chest by the wrists.

“This is exactly what I’m talking about. You are so cold and unfeeling.”

“Unfeeling?” His voice rose a little, though not enough to tell her just how out of control he felt. “I. Am. Holding. Back!” He ran a hand over the top of his hair, then quick put it behind his back because the shaking was starting.

“Well don’t! Whatever it is you have to dish out, I can take it.”

“No you can’t.”

“How will you know if you don’t try?”

Something snapped. Gene wanted her so bad he couldn’t stand it. Anger mixed with the desire as he shoved her to the wall. She could show a little gratitude for what he endured. Instead, she didn’t even know.

He kissed her with everything he had. He already knew she’d shove him off in a minute. Or she could try. This time he wouldn’t make it so easy. He ground against her,

She turned her head, tearing their mouths apart. “Wait.” Her voice squeaked tightly. “We can’t.”

“I’ve had enough of can’t.” He forced himself to let her go before something really bad happened. “So if you aren’t willing to go all the way, then don’t touch me at all.”

He didn’t give her a chance to answer. He walked out without looking back.

If you enjoy Suzie’s House and would like to see more, please leave a comment. Suzie’s House is powered by its readers.