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There’s been a bit of a shake up here at Alice Audrey dot com. Fiction Friday 55 moved to Tuesday. I made a remarkably smooth transition to Friday Fictioneers instead. They seem to be a great group, though I still miss many of my Fiction Friday friends.
About That Post:
T13: How to Live with a Hoarder. I suspect this post will become one of my classics. It was a lot of fun to write. Something about a chance to belly ache about my bruised shins appealed to me.
T13: Kid Quotes Kid Quotes has become a semi-regular feature around here. I generally come up with one about once a year. In the past there were more quotes from my son. Lately he’s been coming up with those great one liners when I have no way of writing them down. I must have lost a dozen great lines that way. The Girl, on the other hand, will repeat them for me until I’ve got them down.
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Work Ethic
Jill: Honey, when are you going to go back to work?
Jack: It’s been too long. I’m rusty.
Jill: It isn’t something you’re going to forget overnight.
Jack: I need practice. See? I’m doing it right now.
Jill: That’s the wrong kind of taxi driving, and you know it.
Previously in Jack and Jill: Alternative Means
The theme for this week’s Jack and Jill is “taxi” as suggested by Brian Miller
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Stormy
When the tornado warning alarms went off, two young men, brothers, spurned the basement in favor of watching the storm. Dark and roiling clouds obliterated the sky, but on land they found mostly wind. There wasn’t much to see.
“Hey look. Doesn’t that cloud remind you of someone?”
“Yeah, it’s just like what mom’s face would look like if she knew we were out here.”
“That one looks like a horse.” The younger of the two pointed to the sky.
“Over there kind of looks like a funnel.”
“A funnel? Where? Uh-oh.”
Photo copyright Kelly Sands according to Rochelle.
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13 Fireworks
I make a tradition of doing a bad job of taking photos of fireworks on the fourth of July. I keep hoping some year I’ll get it right. Here’s this year’s haul:
1.
Suzie’s House 365 : A Translucent Attitude
Bruce knew something was wrong as soon as Uncle John arrived. He had that eerie combination of a guarded look in his eye and a big smile that always meant trouble. Still, Bruce didn’t say anything as the band loaded everything into the van. It wasn’t like anyone would listen anyway. They were all too excited about doing another gig. Well, let them see for themselves just how far you could trust Uncle John.
Fourth of July Tradition
My family comes up with traditions pretty fast. For instance, we seem to have developed a new Fourth of July tradition. Each year we go down town to see the municipal fireworks display. Each time I bring my camera with the intention of getting some bloggable photos. And every year I fail. Miserably. Sadly, I’m going to impose my lousy pictures on you anyway. 🙂
It generally starts with the best of intentions, but too many distractions. By the time we have to go, I will have discovered the battery on however many cameras I choose to take are ALL on their last legs. This year I brought two. Both were barely holding on. The backup batteries I always try to keep on hind were no where to be seen. I many have been running short on memory too, but the batteries didn’t last long enough to know for sure.
Alternative Means
Aunt Gertrude: You mother said she was going on vacation, so you won’t have to worry about her for a while, but I don’t know where.
Jill: Really? Did she say what she was going to do?
Aunt Gertrude: Sledding, apparently.
Jack: So she must be in South America, or maybe Australia.
Aunt Gertrude: Well, maybe. But she built a ramp. I’m pretty sure they won’t let you bring a ramp on an airplane.
Jack and Jill unanimously: Uh-oh.
From the Depths of the Sea
As far as Poseidon was concerned, the hundred years at the bottom of the sea passed in the blink of an eye. He rose to surface in the Mediterranean where he’d often enjoyed bullying the humans. This time, however, the response wasn’t all he expected. No screaming or running or begging for mercy. People actually seemed to find him humorous.
“Dude!” Some transplant from another continent bumped into him. “You look down right gnarly. And they tell me that I need a shave and a haircut.”
Photo Copyright: Claire Fuller
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13 Words
The Girl is such a teenager. She insisted on giving me flack. And guff. She wanted to give me some grief, too, but managed to restrain herself. I don’t think she intended to give me exactly 13 of them, but you know what I had to do once I’d counted them.
Suzie’s House 364 : Keeping His Thoughts to Himself
Gene focused on his fingering, but his heart wasn’t in the practice session.
“…and I’ll divulge my godless dreams,” Emma sang. “My insignificant, paladin dreams.” She stopped singing and lifted the bottom of her paper bag to look at them from its dark recesses. “Wait. Shouldn’t that be paltry?”
“Just go with it,” Kate kept drumming.
“Yeah, I kind of like ‘paladin’,” Justin grinned around the array of hanging glass bottles he’d been experimenting with. “We should make it a trade mark to have something like that in every song.”
“Wait. ‘Paladin’ is wrong?” Tracy stopped strumming.
Physical Therapy
Aren’t you glad I didn’t include any pictures?
It all started well over a year ago when I pulled a groin muscle. At the time I considered it nothing special because I’d pulled the muscles on one or both sides many times while getting on my bicycle or standing up and moving away from my desk too quickly.
Roadkill Stew
Tina: Hey! Something wrong with my peace offering?
Aunt Gertrude: I wouldn’t eat that if I were you.
Jack: Wasn’t planning on it.
Jill: Why not?
Aunt Gertrude: She’s been driving up and down the highways a lot lately.
Jill: Oh. I’m not hungry.
Previously in Jack and Jill: Say Cheese
The theme for this week’s Jack and Jill is “Roadkill stew” as suggested by The Walking Man
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The Parting
PHOTO PROMPT Copyright-Lura Helms.
There came a parting of the ways.
The Keeper of the Flame and The Severance Hand,
long time friends in the battle for righteousness,
disagreed on the likely outcome to the choice of right and not-right.
Keeper insisted on right. Severance Hand insisted on might.
Each took their choice and slunk into the future alone.
Happily Nobody came to the parting of the ways
and took the not-right path without hesitation.
Fool that he pretends to be, he strode forward with his hand in his pocket,
where lay the tool of destruction.
Any minute now, Severance Hand would come into view.
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