Suzie’s House 144: Sharing the News
“Mom! I did it! I talked to Mrs. Audrey.” Ben whipped into the house about five times as fast as he was supposed to. He ran down the hall to the kitchen. “And she said yes!”
Intstead of finding Mom there, he found Miranda, who was packing one of Mom’s travel boxes. The travel boxes looked like toy boxes about the size of a picnic basket. They were great for holding the food on camping trips and stuff.
Bah!
Fluffy sheep jumping white pickets
in Facebook aps
never end.
The same white fence, the same white sheep.
Copy, paste, friend and tweet
Sending round and round
messages of almost-connection.
Warmth from a name
made familiar by kind repetition
lulling the sheep
with illusions of solidity,
making them think
it is safe to jump.
13 Almost Words
For a while now Blogger has been using an interesting “captcha” code thingy. Instead of typing in totally random letters, you’re supposed to type in something that almost looks like a word. As bad as I am at spelling, some of these might even actually be words. For instance:
1. accoras – the boy swam accoras the river.
2. aggil – that acrobat is so aggil.
3. adder – (hey, this one’s real. Right?)
4. baemers – all those rich guys drive baemers.
5. baysomen – it’s either scientific like in biology, or a body of water full of men.
6. bedness – get your nose out of my bedness.
7. bilog – I’m going to post it on my bilog.
8. bused – (another real one?)
9. caagar – “we three kings of orient are smoking on a rubber caagar.”
10. calverse – the Calvin Kline universe.
11. chumi – don’t get too chumi with him, he’s a shark.
12. cluff – Oh no, the well dress explorer fell of a cluff.
13. desent – Be careful on the desent, it’s a long way down.
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A Brief History of Underwear
In honor of the episode of Suzie’s House in which Ben wears his underwear on his head to convince Gene he’s serious about an apology (you’d have to read it – both part one and part two – to understand) I’m going to focus on the history of the whitey tighty this week.
I was going to start with the loincloth, since consensus has it that counts as the first ever men’s underwear. The idea was to take a long strip of cloth, run it between the legs, then tie it off at the waist. There are some interesting twists and tucks involved and the results can vary greatly with the same piece of fabric. I don’t happen to have one of these, so looked for one on the Internet. Be grateful I decided to refrain from posting pictures.
Most people go from here to the cod piece, but again, you don’t need to see that. Not nearly as fun as it sounds.
So, starting from the Medieval period (yes, we’re going European) the most similar item of undergarment would be the braies. These were pants of varying length and shape worn under a long tunic. They tended to have laces or strings tied around the waist to hold them up, and could be argued to be pants as much as undies.
By the Georgian period braies had given way to drawers, which could come in short, or “small clothes” which were a little longer, or long forms, depending on what was to be worn over the top.
About the time the industrial revolution got off the ground, the union suit became a common form of underwear. The union suit, more commonly known as long johns, acted as a second skin. They were generally knitted as one piced, had a drop flap in back, and were worn by both men and women. In 1910 they were split into top and bottom parts.
The Jock strap came along in 1874, and was originally intended as a device to comfort men riding bicycles over the cobblestone streets of Boston.
The 1930’s brought about the invention of what we would consider modern underwear. The jockey, the boxer, and a plethora of designs long since discarded came about then. The greatest innovation? Elastic waistbands.
Now if we can only get our kids to stop showing them off.
The Meaning of Life
My Sister in Law died a few hours ago. I mentioned her several months ago. She was diagnosed with terminal cancer. It’s actually quite amazing that she managed to live even this long after the original prognoses.
We weren’t particularly close. I’ll certainly miss her, and am feeling a kind of missed-step hollowness, but I won’t be shedding many tears.
I won’t discuss the details of her life or death here. I would like to say she led a full life, but it would have to be by her definition, not mine. I will say she wasn’t a young woman, an had already done with her life as much as she was likely to.
It has me thinking about the meaning of life. There are so many things I still hope to accomplish in my life. So many things I care about.
My kids are almost grown, but for now, they still need me. My writing efforts are finally starting to pay off. And there are still a lot of things in life I’d like to learn.
When I boil it down, it always all comes back to love. I am here because I love my life. I love the people in it and the things we do.
What is the driving force in your life? What will make you turn off the TV and engage in the world around you? What do you love?
Fw: The Irish Bagpiper
As a bagpiper, I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man who had no family or friends. The funeral was to be held at a cemetery in the remote countryside and this man would be the first to be laid to rest there.
As I was not familiar with the backwoods area, I became lost and being a typical man, did not stop for directions. I finally arrived an hour late. I saw the backhoe and the crew who were eating lunch but the hearse was nowhere in sight.
I apologized to the workers for my tardiness and stepped to the side of the open grave where I saw the vault lid already in place.
I assured the workers I would not hold them up for long but this was the proper thing to do. The workers gathered around, still eating their lunch. I played out my heart and soul.
As I played the workers began to weep. I played and I played like I’d never played before, from Going Home and The Lord is My Shepherd to Flowers of the Forest . I closed the lengthy session with Amazing Grace and walked to my car..
As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I overheard one of the workers saying to another, “Sweet Jeezuz, Mary’n Joseph, I never seen nothin’ like that before and I’ve been putting in septic tanks for twenty years.”
Santa’s Whiskers
This is a fun little bite-sized cookie. Don’t skip the chilling stage, though, or you’ll end up with flat ovals when you go to cut them.
1 c butter
1 c sugar
2 Tbs milk
1 tsp vanilla
2 1/2 c flour
1 c finely chopped red (and) or green candied cherries
1/2 c finely chopped pecans
1 c flaked coconut
Beat butter for 30 seconds. Add sugar and beat till fluffy. Add milk and vanilla and beat. Stir in flour, then cherries, then pecans. Shape into three 12 inch rolls. Coat with coconut, wrap in waxed paper, then chill thoroughly. cut into 1/4 inch slices. Bake at 375F for about 12 minutes, or till edges are golden. Makes plenty.
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Mouthing Off
Jack: I may not have worked out the way you did, but I’m still in great shape. See.
Jill: You? In great shape? Pft!!!
Jack: What do you mean by that?
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(continued directly from last week and continuing on next week)
Today’s theme is undesirable
Previously in Jack and Jill Working Out
Saturday photo scavenger hunt
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