Ah Maria, She’s the Most Powerful Woman in France
Maria Theressa of Austria sent her daughter, Marie Antoinette, off to France with little preparation and many fears. Prince Louis didn’t help matters when he put off the consummation for years.
Wrote Maria to Marie on the subject of getting her husband to…cooperate…so to speak.
“On no account any peevishness, but only tenderness and caresses; for too much eagerness could ruin everything. Gentleness and patience are the only things that can help. Nothing so far is lost. You are both so young. On the contrary, it is better this way for the health of both of you. You will both grow stronger. All the same, it is only natural that we old parents long for the consummation.”
According to one historian; “As time went by she forgot about patience.”
Once a month Marie sent mom a letter telling her how things were going. Mom would respond to these letters. Indeed, mom was sending out detailed letters every two weeks. It seems never to have occurred to Marie to ask her mother how she came to possess such detailed information about stuff she had never even written home about.
“There’s no percentage in thinking positive. When reality hits you between the eyes”– and in the ribs, and the kidneys — “it’s just that much worse.”
Win a Copy of Packing Heat by Penny McCall
FBI Agent Harmony Swift looks like a blond bimbo from L.A., but she’s got a good head on her shoulders. She can out- shoot, out-drive, out-boat, and out-think everyone from a corrupt FBI department head to the Russian mafia. It’s only natural she should end up with a genius computer guy who looks like every woman’s wet dream. And all she has to do to get him is break him out of jail, convince him to trust a bureau that framed him eight years earlier, and keep him alive all while racing across the country to save the closest thing she has to a father. Easy.
This is a rollicky good book. Lots of narrow escapes and snappy dialogue. I loved both the hero and heroine. It’s a signed copy. Well worth leaving a comment for.
Leave a comment here between now and Thursday night. Friday I’ll pick and announce a winner.
You can find teasers from this book here and here.
Mr. Impatience.
“Mom, hurry up. My girlfriend’s waiting and you said we’d go soon. What do you mean you need a shower first? Just throw a shirt over your night gown and let’s go already!”
Monkey Man hosts the 160 Character Challenge. See what you can write in 160 characters or less, spaces included.
Ah Maria, It Was Merely a Tiff
Having inadvertently raisied Marie Antoinette to have strong, puritanical notions, there was little her mother could do to make her understand the special place of a king’s mistress.
“The Court of Versailles was beside itself with delight at the spectacle of this child setting herself up against the King’s mistress, therefore, against Louis himself.” And this was what Marie Antoinette could not grasp. She was too young and too un-worldly to understand what Madame Dubarry meant to King Louis. As a result, she continued to diss Dubarry at every opportunity.
Needless to say, King Louis got an earful from his girlfriend. No doubt Madame Dubarry knew full well that the King’s daughters were real source of the trouble, but they were untouchable. And she could not ignore the fact that Marie was an enthusiastic participant even if she didn’t fully understand what she was doing. Bookmakers were doing a land-office business taking wagers on what would happen next.
King Louis put a flea in the ear of Madame de Noailles. “Tell your mistress to stick to her knitting. She may one day be Queen of France, but I am the King of France NOW. My girlfriend is furious and that makes things bad for me. Make sure she understands that.” Madame de Noailles passed this on to Marie with some words of her own. Marie understood. Unnerved, she told the Royal Sisters-in-law and Abbe Vermond, who went to Count Mercy with some advice. “Do something about that girl.”
A Western Man
Jack: How long until it gets here? I don’t want anyone to see me like this.
Jill: There’s no shame in it.
Jack: I was doing just fine fixing the truck on my own. We don’t need a mechanic, just a few parts.
Jill: Yes, I know. We’ll get them now.
Jack: I can’t believe there was no one around to give us a ride! It better get here soon. I don’t want anyone to know.
Jill: You know, in some parts of the country no one thinks twice about using public transportation.
Today’s theme is public
Previously in Jack and Jill: Hangups
The rules for Photohunt can be found here.
Be sure to visit the home page.
Suzie’s House 175: The Slip of the Wrench
Suzie swore. Actual cuss words. Vin couldn’t remember the last time he’d heard Suzy swear. He could hear her over the low drone of the TV, which made him realize he wasn’t watching anyway and shouldn’t waste his entire life like this, constantly changing channels and feeling dissatisfied. So, in a rare break in his own habits, Vin turned the idiot box off, and went to see what had Suzie so upset.
Cowboy Up
The announcer’s garbled voice
echoed around the arena
as the buzzer went off.
The gate swung open
and the bull took his first crow hop.
Hand up, back jarring, rump slamming on spiny back
Slam, slam, slam then
Flying
Over the horns. Under the hooves,
A ton of angry animal bucking away.
“Oh too bad. Half a second short.”
Cowboy dusts off his pants, grinning.
Except his wallet, and maybe some pride,
all parts are intact.
The challenge, should you choose to accept it, is to write a story in exactly 55 words. Flash Fiction 55 is hosted by the G-man, a host with the most.
13 Signs of Summer
Totally Random Picture:
You know it’s Summer When:
1. Listening to the neighbor’s dog take a dump is more comfortable than closing the window and letting the temperature climb.
2. You accidentally memorize the names of all the pets and children within yelling range.
3. You learn the musical preferences of everyone who drives past.
4. You don’t think twice about sharing your musical preferences as you drive. Unless the car’s AC works better than rolling down the window.
5. Shooting off fireworks from a mall parking lot seems like a good idea.
6. Running fully clothed through a sprinkler seems like a good idea.
7. Freezing slices of watermelon seems like a good idea.
8. Unless you make the mistake of taking the frozen slices out of the freezer too soon.
9. You find mushy, thawed watermelon slices behind the easy chair.
10. And it wasn’t the kids who left it there.
11. The goldfish look like they are melting.
12. The houseplants are getting too much sun.
13. You get so lazy you can’t even come up with a list of 13 things.
Ah Maria, a Match Made in Heaven… or Not.
We now veer sharply into titillating details of Marie Antoinette’s marriage.
A proxy marriage ceremony was carried out in Vienna and a game of one-upmanship between Austria and France shifted into high gear. Receptions of the utmost splendor were held at the Belvedere and Liechtenstein Palaces. Full-dress military reviews, theater galas and much more filled the itinerary. And while all this was taking place in Vienna, frantic preparations were under way at Versailles, including the construction of a new opera house.
The duc de Dufort arrived in April 1770 to attend the wedding and to escort the blushing bride to France. This was not going to be a quick road trip. The train of wagons and coaches required 340 horses, plus two traveling coaches of “fabulous splendor, especially designed and constructed for the occasion by order of the French King.”
This was the public face of the wedding. Behind the scenes, things were even more complicated. And not at all amendable to being fixed by a command from a king or queen. This was a binding of the two most powerful dynasties of Europe. The Hapsburg and Bourbon families were ancient. They bowed to no one. Including each other. Which presented a unique problem.
Song and Dance
Here’s something to keep you entertained for a little while, because I still haven’t straightened out my guest blogger traffic snarl yet. It will probably be a couple of weeks.
If that wasn’t enough, check this out:
Emily at Random Ability brought this to my attention. It pays to read her comment stream.
What Isn’t Said
(Totally Random Picture)
She’s always doing that; saying something but not enough so we know what she really means. Always hinting of something deeper. But if you ask, she says it’s nothing.
Monkey Man hosts the 160 Character Challenge. See what you can write in 160 characters or less, spaces included.
Hangups
Jack: What are you doing up there, Gin? We’ve been calling you for dinner. Need some help down?
Gin: Meow.
Jack: Hold on. Let me make a lasso and I’ll get you down. Oops.
Jack: Gin! Wait! Don’t leave me hanging here.
Today’s theme is hanging
Previously in Jack and Jill: Jill’s Latest Kick
The rules for Photohunt can be found here.
Be sure to visit the home page.
Suzie’s House 174: His Call
“I hate her.” Gene slammed the phone into the receiver, the plastic thud of it echoing through downstairs hall.
“Who?” Mrs. H said from the kitchen.
“My mother.”
