fwd: NORWEGIAN FIRE DEPARTMENT
One dark night outside a small town in Minnesota , a fire started inside the local chemical plant and in a blink of an eye it exploded into massive flames. The alarm went out to all the fire departments for miles around.
When the volunteer fire fighters appeared on the scene, the chemical company president rushed to the fire chief and said, “All our secret formulas are in the vault in the center of the plant. They must be saved. I will give $50,000 to the fire department that brings them out intact.”
But the roaring flames held the firefighters off.
Soon more fire departments had to be called in as the situation became desperate. As the firemen arrived, the president shouted out that the offer was now $100,000 to the fire department who could bring out the company’s secret files.
From the distance, a lone siren was heard as another fire truck came into sight. It was the nearby Norwegian rural township volunteer fire company composed mainly of Norwegians over the age of 65. To everyone’s amazement, that little run-down fire engine roared right past all the newer sleek engines that were parked outside the plant.
Without even slowing down it drove straight into the middle of the inferno. Outside, the other firemen watched as the Norwegian old timers jumped off right in the middle of the fire fought it back on all sides. It was a performance and effort never seen before.
Within a short time, the Norske old timers had extinguished the fire and had saved the secret formulas. The grateful chemical company president announced that for such a superhuman feat he was upping the reward to $200,000, and walked over to personally thank each of the brave fire fighters.
The local TV news reporter rushed in to capture the event on film, asking their chief, “What are you going to do with all that money?”
“Vell,” said Ole Larsen, the 70-year-old fire chief, “Da first thing ve gonna do is fix da brakes on dat focking truck!”
On Edge
Wow, what a view. Just let me get a little closer. I want to take a picture. Sure is windy today, but that doesn’t matter. What? Me fall? Don’t worry! I’ll be… whoops!
Monkey Man hosts the 160 Character Challenge. See what you can write in 160 characters or less, spaces included.
Handyman
Jack: You want me to fix this?
Jill: You said you were good with machines.
Jack: Since when has a stove with no pilot light counted as a machine?
Jill: Just do what you can.
Jill: What are you doing?
Jack: I thought I’d start with what I’m good at – a match-ing.
Today’s theme is machine
Still not at my desk yet, so no “previously in” but hopefully with the next one.
The rules for Photohunt can be found here.
Be sure to visit the home page.
Suzie’s House 203 : And I’m Sticking To It
Ben emptied his pockets onto his desk as soon as he walked into his room. He’d let a permission slip go through the laundry a couple of days ago, and Mom was still taking about it. Better to not have anything in his pockets too long, just in case.
55 – Butterfly
Her gossamer wings of taffeta
and skirts of layered tulle,
each step on the floorboards behind the curtain
a quiet din in her ears,
the butterfly takes her place
prepared for her entrance.
“Hick! Oh no! I have the hick-ups”
“Don’t worry. It’s better that way. They make your wings flutter.”
The challenge, should you choose to accept it, is to write a story in exactly 55 words. Click on the badge to go to the hub.
13 Things Not On My Desk
It’s been a long time since I’ve spent any significant time at my desk. so I’m not looking at the stuff on it. Instead, I’m settled in an easy chair in the living room. So here’s a list of what I can see from here.
1. Plants. Lots of them.
2. The TV, which is off until The Boy gets home.
3. The Playstation – same deal.
4. A funky lamp.
5. DVD/Video player. Also off all day.
6. A bottle of alcohol rub, unopened
7. A bookcase full of books.
8. A stool with a video sitting on it.
9. A sword hanging on the wall.
10. My laptop, which I’m living with.
11. A stack of bills.
12. A stack of receipts.
13. An envelope of tax forms.
Fwd: Fw: Top This Speeding Ticket
> True story or not…..this sounds interesting.
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> Top This One For A Speeding Ticket
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> Two California Highway Patrol Officers were conducting speeding enforcement on I-15, just north of the Marine Corps Air Station at Miramar . One of the officers was using a hand held radar device to check speeding vehicles approaching the crest of a hill. The officers were suddenly surprised when the radar gun began reading 300 miles per hour. The officer attempted to reset the radar gun, but it would not reset and then turned off.
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> Just then a deafening roar over the treetops revealed that the radar had in fact locked on to a USMC F/A-18 Hornet which was engaged in a low flying exercise near the location.
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> Back at the CHP Headquarters the Patrol Captain fired off a complaint to the USMC Base Commander. The reply came back in true USMC style:
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> Thank you for your letter. We can now complete the file on this incident.
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> You may be interested to know that the tactical computer in the Hornet had detected the presence of, and subsequently locked on to your hostile radar equipment and automatically sent a jamming signal back to it, which is why it shut down.
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> Furthermore, an Air-to-Ground missile aboard the fully armed aircraft had also automatically locked on to your equipment location.
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> Fortunately, the Marine Pilot flying the Hornet recognized the situation for what it was, quickly responded to the missile system alert status and was able to override the automated defense system before the missile was launched to destroy the hostile radar position.
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> The pilot also suggests you cover your mouths when cussing at them, since the video systems on these jets are very high tech.
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> Sergeant Johnson, the officer holding the radar gun, should get his dentist to check his left rear molar. It appears the filling is loose. Also, the snap is broken on his holster.
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> Thank you for your concern.
Win an Autographed Copy of Count to Ten by Karen Rose
I did a teaser on this one last Tuesday, and will do another tomorrow.
Mia Mitchell is a police officer, a daughter of a police officer, and a mess. She’s lost two partners and taken a few shots already and doesn’t want to lose any more. The best way to see that happen is to not get another partner.
But in the police world it doesn’t work that way. When Chicago Fire Department Lieutenant Reed Solliday comes to the department with an arsonist who murders, it calls for the merging of departments, and Mia gets a new temporary partner.
This is a Romantic Suspense, so you can pretty well bet the temporary aspect only applies to work relations, even though Reed is still grieving ten years after his wife’s death. Used to her soft, gentle heart, he’s finding Mia’s fiery temper and strong opinions quite the change of pace.
Throw in a vicious killer whose favorite weapon is an explosive packed plastic egg and things heat up fast.
Leave a comment here between now and Thursday night to enter. I’ll do the drawing on Friday and announce the winner in my sidebar some time on Friday. International entries welcome.
160 – The Diet
“I’ve got the perfect diet for you. You’ll love it.”
“No I won’t. I hate all diets. You lose the weight then as soon as you stop dieting it all comes right back.”
“Not this one. It’s called The Chocolate Diet.”
Monkey Man hosts the 160 Character Challenge. See what you can write in 160 characters or less, spaces included.
A Bed of Roses
He wishes.
Today’s theme is Self-portrait
The rules for Photohunt can be found here.
Be sure to visit the home page.
Suzie’s House 202: That’s My Story
She said to keep a journal. Mrs. Audrey, that was. She said it would help him clear out stuff and keep words flowing and a bunch of other things. Ben liked it better than all the reading she had him doing, which wasn’t all that bad either, so maybe he should give it a try.
55 – A Modicum of Dignity
Again, not enough to pay for everything. Standing in front of the automated check-out and trying to choose – meat or cheese this week? Pitiful shopping cart not even half full, hardly enough to keep them alive, but still too much. At least only a machine stood as witness as she left the hamburger behind.
The challenge, should you choose to accept it, is to write a story in exactly 55 words. Flash Fiction 55 is hosted by the G-man, a host with the most.
13 Words
I’m not in the mood to do a big, complicated list this week, so I’m doing a quick word association thing.
1. lazy
2. work
3. hard
4. soft
5. paintball
6. folf (frisbee golf)
7. course
8. education
9. higher
10. ground
11. coffee
12. garden
13. delight
