Author Archives: aliceaudrey
T-Day Minus One
On the task list for today – Toast the bread and make cornbread for the dressing. Mix dressing’s dry ingredients in a big bowl with a lid then set aside. Make the cranberry dressing. Take the giblets out of the turkey and cook them up. What?! It’s still frozen?!! Argh. Fine, get giblets out with a chisel, but get them out and cook them up now cause I am NOT getting up a 3am to make the dressing. Not this […]
FanLit Forever Due
We interrupt this turkey count down to remind everyone that tomorrow is the least day in which to submit something for the first ever FanLit Forever challenge. Can you do it? . Alice
T-Day Minus Two
You know how Foxworthy likes to do those “You might be a redneck if…” jokes? I’ve got “You might procrastinate too much if…” jokes. You might procrastinate too much if … …the tools you need to get ready for a party include a pumber’s wrench, a screw driver, a hammer, or a paintbrush. … your child’s teacher phones – yes PHONES – to find out where the reports for the last four chapters went, and you only got your hands […]
T-Day Minus Three
I keep thinking of the time my grandmother dropped the turkey as she was bringing it into the dining room. The minister and his family were present along with the president of the women’s relief society. She said she could cry to have to face them with no main course. Luckly Grandma was a smark cookie. She said “Let me go get the other one” as she picked everything up. She took it into the kitchen, cleaned it up, put […]
T-Day Minus Four
Did you hear the one about the woman who decided to try a popcorn dressing in her turkey? She decided to skip a step. She filled the bird with un-popped popcorn. Everything looked fine until the oven door burst open and the turkey shot across the kitchen, spewing popcorn like rocket fuel. She and her family had their Thanksgiving dinner at a Chinese restaurant. . On the task list for today – poke the turkey and see if it’s still […]
T-Day Count Down
I’m hosting Thanksgiving this year, as I have for the last half-dozen. Usually I recruit my mother and sister to help make the meal, but due to health problems it doesn’t look like it this time. Which means it’s up to me and the kids. When faced with a daunting task – make a list. First on the list is a trip to the grocery store. I almost forgot I had to get the turkey with enough time for it […]
Who is Suzy Homemaker?
You may have noticed that some of my blogs are labeled “Suzy Homemaker”. There is a reason for that. Back when I was in Jr. High and High school everyone was required to attend either Home Ec classes or Shop. The thing is the women’s movement had gotten far enough along that the schools could no longer tell you which one to take, based on gender, but everyone expected girls to do Home Ec and boys to do Shop. One […]
The Big Muffin
When I first started making this recipe from the side of the cereal box it called for 1/3c oil and 1/2 tsp salt. Then health conscience set in and it called for 1/4 c oil and no salt, which wasn’t nearly as good. Now they say reduce the oil even more. I say, don’t do it. Maybe add the apple sauce, but don’t reduce the oil. My modifications? You knew that was coming. *grin* I pour the entire recipe into […]
Reply to a Squawk
Lisa Kleypas has a concern that she put on Squawk Radio. She’s worried about large-scale illiteracy. I believe I come from a uniquely pertinent point of view. But for the grace of God I would now be nearly illiterate. The same level of illiterate as Michael Rogers advocates. Reading was always hard for me, made harder by poor social skills and some issues which I have no intention of discussing here. When I hit 6th grade I still struggled with […]
Gerbil TV
I suppose it’s about time I answered the question. What is Gerbil TV? Keep in mind that my family gave up cable TV a few years ago. We still get broadcast, when the weather is good, and rent videos a fair amount, but we don’t do any channel surfing. Last year we went to the pet store and got a couple of gerbils for my daughter. Gerbils are fun to watch. They are sociable creatures who get along much better […]
How to Find My Work
I do have a chapter posted on my web site. It takes a little work to get to it. If you click on WIP you should see the feature book right now is ‘Zackly Right. This is the one I’m working on for the Golden Heart. If you click on ‘Zackly Right you will get the first chapter of the book. Arrow down past all the warnings about how you have to be of age to read it. It takes […]
Point of View, I Suppose.
Just out of curiosity, how many people think Goldilocks is the heroine in Goldilocks and the three bears? I’d say she’s the villian. Alice
In Search of Perfection
I have decided it isn’t possible to achieve perfection in writing fiction. For one thing, how do you define perfection? I have never yet reached a point in any of my WIPs that I felt nothing needed to be changed. So maybe that’s because I’m still growing as a writer, but maybe not. Maybe it’s because fiction isn’t like accounting. Mind you accounting can be remarkably malleable. But at least there you can come up with a number that can […]
The Answer to Tag
Is #4 “I once gave a gerbil mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.” Haven’t needed to yet. I’m sure hoping I never do. I sold the house for 120% of what I put into it, including purchase price and repairs. In actuality, though the buyers asked to see the house during the yard sale and had obviously made up their minds, they did have an inspector go through and passed a contract back and forth a couple of times so it was a couple […]
